Would You Rather...
Have a voice that sounded like you were permanently on helium...
or always have to speak in rhyme?
Live in a wigwam...
or share a bedsit with Graham Norton?
Have to hop everywhere...
or be permanently on rollerskates?
Have 3 ears...
or no nose?
Have to eat a worm...
or have to drink a pint of dishwater?
Have really bad BO...
or everyone else has really bad BO?
Have to walk backwards everywhere...
or have to shake the hand of everyone you talk to?
Have the national anthem stuck in your head forever...
or have to sing '3 blind mice' every time you answer the phone?
Sneeze on the hour, every hour...
or have a 20 minute bout of hiccoughs 3 times a day?
Be able to see what everyone else is thinking...
or everyone else see what you're thinking?
Be able to impersonate anyone's voice...
or have a key which opens any lock?
Permanently have to wear a sandwich board saying 'the end is nigh'...
or have yellow eyes?
Have to watch your favourite film every night for the next month...
or have to spend a whole day listening to your favourite song on repeat?
Be nocturnal...
or have to commute for 3 hours to get to work?
Your only mode of transport was a unicycle...
or a camel?
Become invisible every weekend...
or be in solitary confinement every weekend?
Have a lightbulb tattooed on your forehead...
or always have to wear a pair of joke fangs?
Own, and be able to fly, your own helicopter for a year...
or have free train travel for life?
Be able to speak 5 languages fluently...
or be able to play 10 musical instruments to concert standard?
Have abnormally hairy feet...
or only be able to change your underwear once a week?
Have a pair of castanets permanently attached to your right hand...
or always have one trouser leg rolled up to the knee?
Have to walk 10 miles a day...
or only be allowed to walk a maximum of 1 mile a day?
Have to clean a car with your tongue...
or eat a rabbit dropping?
Be stuck in a lift with a warthog for 5 hours...
or spend a 2 hour train journey sitting next to a screaming baby?
Nobody ever made eye contact with you...
or people stared at you all the time?
Be briefly immersed in a bath full of slugs...
or have a used nappy tied to your head all day?
Constantly forgot all your pin numbers and passwords...
or constantly lose your house keys?
Only be able to eat standing up...
or have to lie down for 10 minutes after everything you eat?
You could never have photographs of anybody...
or nobody could ever remember your name?
Feel itchy all the time...
or be bald?
You could only see everything in black and white...
or every other day you could only see everything upside down?
Have hair that grows 2 inches a day...
or never be able to cut your fingernails and toenails?
Have really hairy ears...
or have to listen to 30 mins of bagpipe music every night?
